Sleep separation anxiety should start with day time separation anxiety and should be worked on during the day time. Put a picture of yourself next to their bed and a picture of you next to your bed to solidify that connection that they want at night. Do dry runs during the day of what the bedtime routine should look like. Gentle Parenting is not completely new. "How to Talk So Kids Will Listen" was published in 1999 and suggests treating kids with respect and consideration. (I think it's a great book -- highly recommend). "Kids, Parents, Power Struggles" by Kurcinka was published in 2001. However, the primary thrust of Kurcinka was to develop a close relationship with your child, NOT that you are responsible for managing their emotions.

Good Inside Book Review | Dr. Becky Kennedy - Ruth Nuss Good Inside Book Review | Dr. Becky Kennedy - Ruth Nuss

There are unstated lines to "if you have a problem with anything your kids are doing, you need to work on yourself instead" and "whatever your behavior as a parent is, it's fine as long as you do better later." I got the sense she assumes we're all from the same culture/class/upbringing/etc and knows what isn't being said. We want to prepare our kids to cope with emotions, not protect them from emotions they will inevitably experience. Resilience over happiness. 5. Tell the truth. In this Blink, you’ll learn how to use connection-based strategies and find a way to hold your boundaries while teaching your child how to navigate their feelings and experiences without fear, shame, or self-doubt. When happiness is your goal, negative feelings are an obstacle. And we should all be allowed our own feelings. When following the good-inside approach to parenting, the idea is never to change, judge, or avoid a child’s feelings. Robežas nenozīmē pateikt bērniem, ko viņi nedrīkst darīt; robežas nozīmē pateikt bērniem, ko mēs darīsim.

This is the best parenting book I’ve ever read. Dr. Kennedy is a clinical PhD psychologist and her approach and methodology to parenting is one of compassion, understanding, patience and engagement. From this book I feel like I’ve learned three key things that all children seek: connection, bodily autonomy and boundaries. Most conflicts arise when one or all of these three needs are not being met. There are so many nuggets of good advice here that all cohere with a grand strategy of recognizing that behaviors are not your child, they are windows into their needs.

Good Inside: A Guide to Becoming the Parent You Want to Be Good Inside: A Guide to Becoming the Parent You Want to Be

Saskaroties ar kaprīžu lēkmēm, vecākiem ir jācenšas palikt mierīgiem, jo mūsu bērnu nespēja sevi noregulēt izraisa mūsos vainas apziņu. Ārēja vainošana vienmēr ir saistīta ar iekšēju vainas izjūtu – ja brīnāmies, kas notiek ar bērnu, tad vienlaikus domājam, kas notiek ar mums pašiem. Var gadīties, ka mēs pat padomājam: “Es neprotu audzināt savu bērnu.” Tā ir sāpīga doma, tik ļoti sāpīga, ka mēs bieži cenšamies apturēt bērna kaprīzes lēkmi, lai vienlaikus pārtrauktu paši savas ciešanas. Tāpēc nākamreiz, kad jūsu bērns sāks trakot, pirms ķeraties pie kāda cita paņēmiena, pasakiet sev: “Ar mani viss ir kārtībā. Ar manu bērnu viss ir kārtībā. Es varu ar to tikt galā.”

Parenting, Family Conflict Resolution, Conflict Management, Popular Child Psychology, Self-Help, Relationships About the author Trying to see what the deal is with this very popular thing. I was curious about the book because when I'd heard Kennedy in an interview and in a bit of her podcast, I've found her suggested language to be passive-aggressive, guilt-trippy, and just phenomenally wordy. I actually thought the book was a lot better in this regard. In summary, I think every parent should read this book. This review really only scratches the surface. Every time I opened the book to reference for this post, I’d find something else I wanted to include. I had to finally just cut myself off, lol!

Good Inside: A Guide to Becoming - OceanofPDF [PDF] [EPUB] Good Inside: A Guide to Becoming - OceanofPDF

But as stated before, if you’re past the early years wondering if it’s too late, it’s not. The brain has neuroplasticity – which is the ability to rewire based on new information. If you have past situations you aren’t proud of, you and your child can rewrite the ending through a process called repair. I’ve read all the parenting books. Literally -- it’s my hobby. There are plenty of people who have great outcomes using more authoritarian methods. And it’s because they aren’t just feeding and clothing their kids and putting them into time out. They genuinely care about their kids, inside and out, and work with them to help them grow into their potential. They are just stricter about boundaries and less indulgent of emotions. If you truly care about your kids they will notice, they will like you, they are more likely to care about what you care about. In part three, Kennedy offers strategies for navigating common parenting challenges, such as tantrums, defiance, and sibling rivalry. Kennedy emphasizes the importance of consistency, communication, and setting clear boundaries. She also offers strategies for managing difficult emotions, such as anger and guilt. Kennedy stresses the importance of seeking support from friends, family, and professionals when needed. Conclusion I had plans to run errands, so I end up taking him along. As soon as he has enough distance to see the situation objectively, he is full of regrets and has a meltdown. Instead of running my errands, I’m now once again validating and reflecting and sitting with him in his big feelings. Book Summary: Born to Win by Zig Ziglar with Tom Ziglar In “Born to Win,” Zig Ziglar and his son Tom Ziglar share their wisdom and insights on how to live a successful and fulfilling life. The book is divided into…

Customer reviews

Don’t you just want your kids to be happy? I’m asked this all the time. And honestly, the answer is No. To be clear, I am not wishing for my kids to be unhappy, but a focus on happiness in childhood tends to lead to an adulthood filled with anxiety. Building connections is an ongoing process. This isn’t a fix-it-and-forget-it situation. Connections need to be established, maintained, and grown. Atcerieties: bērniem nekas nešķiet tik šausmīgs kā sāpīgās jūtas, ar kurām viņi paliek vieni, attiecību salabošana šo vientulību aizstāj ar saikni, un tam vajadzētu kļūt par mūsu viskvēlāko vēlmi un mērķi.

Good Inside: A Practical Guide to Becoming the Parent You Good Inside: A Practical Guide to Becoming the Parent You

USEFUL BITS: The second half is brilliantly practical, as are the scenarios throughout e.g. when your child refuses to put their coat on, when TV time is up. Even if you don't like the phrasing - they give you food for thought on what you might do differently. Agreeing to the “good inside” belief is the foundation for everything that’s coming next. Because once you treat your children, yourself, and everyone, really, with the understanding that they’re inherently good inside, you’ll start to make more generous interpretations of their behavior. Jo dziļāku saikni mēs jūtam ar kādu, jo gatavāki esam izpildīt šī cilvēka prasības. Būtībā klausīšana ir kā attiecību stipruma barometrs. Tāpēc, kad bērni mūs neklausa, ir ļoti svarīgi šīs grūtības uztvert nevis kā problēmu ar bērnu, bet gan kā jūsu savstarpējo attiecību sarežģījumu. Ja bērns jūs ignorē vai reti klausa jūsu lūgumiem, viņš bez vārdiem cenšas pateikt, ka jūsu attiecībām ir nepieciešamas papildu rūpes un mīlestība. As we mentioned before, connection is the cure to shame. In the next section, we’ll talk about how to build connection capital with your kids. Connection is Key Tantrums can actually be good because they teach children to advocate for themselves. They are just a tsunami of unregulated emotion. Containment is key during a tantrum, not engaging with logic. You contain and connect and then talk once talk once the tantrum has passed. Name the wish underneath the tantrum which helps with immediate connection. Remember these words during an unsafe tantrum “I won’t let you…” because it gives them the boundaries that they are seeking.

Part Two: The Emotional Health of the Child

What am I saying? There are definitely kids who may benefit from this kind of intensive parenting. But they are the minority. So take a deep breath. You’re probably doing fine. I think that sometimes as parents we assume we are being authoritarian or controlling if we choose to hold a boundary. And if we loosen up on a boundary because our kid is upset, then we are letting our kid walk all over us. It can be hard to find a balance, but I think the beauty is in the balance. If we remind ourselves that “two things can be true,” we know that we can hold a boundary while also accepting and listening to our kid’s reaction to that boundary. Let’s say our kid comes home from school upset about not being invited to a slumber party. If we focus on a flight to happiness, we’d say, “Well you don’t even really like her anyways! It’s fine! Let’s plan our own slumber party that night. You can invite Keala and Aura and Pia.” If we focus on building resilience, we’d say, “I’m so glad you’re talking to me about this. It stinks to feel left out. I know.” And then pause to see what happens next. Maybe you share a story of being left out. Maybe your daughter eventually wants to plan her own slumber party—not from a place of avoidance, but as something that comes after feeling like it’s OK to feel sad and disappointed. This builds your child’s tolerance to sit with upset feelings because you’ve modeled that you are able to sit with this feeling. “The more able we are to regulate hard feelings, the more space there is in our bodies to generate happiness.”