Normally I was writing from about 9pm 'til 2am every day. Most of the day is taken up by other things, my husband goes to bed really early and I can't sleep until about 2am. So, when he goes to bed, I have a glass of wine, start writing and I don’t go to bed until really late. It's ridiculous and it’s not a normal way of living your life, but that’s how I wrote Jog On as well. It’s the only way I can do it and it’s the time of day when my head is quiet enough. And for this book, it worked quite nicely weirdly - writing a book about murder sitting there in the dark on your own. What role does reading play in your life? There’s also too much politics and talk of privilege that I didn’t really come to the book to read, and to be honest… a skinny white middle class woman writing a book about exercise complaining that most of the representation of exercise from online content comes from skinny middle class women I found a bit irritating. She was very nervous to visit a gym or a park; therefore, she discovered a private alleyway near her home instead. She simply succeeded to run for just three minutes that evening she started, and she did more of walking in between. However, later on; she discovered something extraordinary: she hadn’t cried for a complete quarter of an hour. However, the sedentary group hadn’t formed these connections. This shows that, at a neurological level, exercise prepares us to deal with stress better. It definitely assisted Bella.

I line up a book promo and write a chunk of my novel in the afternoon. Saying ‘my novel’ is ridiculous since really only my mum has read it so far. When I get jittery from Diet Coke and sitting down for too long, I go into our junk room (the size of a toilet and filled with stuff we don't know where to put anywhere else) and retrieve some dumbbells and a CMT device, which is basically a dumbbell with handles and filled with ball bearings. I try and do three rounds of five different arm exercises and then some sporadic shaking with the CMT. Then I'll push through a run – same 12k. Even while Bella was still a young child, she was very anxious. Everything scared her – from surreal pieces of art to specific songs to the noises generated from cars. Her stomach, as well as her chest, usually hurt with worry. When she attended school parties, she would get a strong sense of fear; something would just feel wrong. Chapter 5 – Working out in nature offers your mental health an additional boost –a thing Bella personally felt. Then I do 100 squats and lunges, with weights. I have done this for five years and my bum still doesn't look any different, but I feel like maybe now I'm just holding it up so I can't quit them. I use a kettlebell and swing it about a bit and then I drink Diet Coke to wake me up. I can't make coffee. I have about ten different machines and pots and still every cup of coffee I make myself tastes like manure, so I drink Diet Coke (which I am addicted to) and drink a Berocca. I also have cold green tea, which I make the night before. Again, this seems to do nothing for me but I'm scared to stop in case it's literally holding my metabolism together by a thread.

Saturday

Bella’s brilliant love letter to running turns into an extraordinarily brave and frank account of her battle with anxiety. A compassionate and important book’ Joe Lycett Anxious even as a very small child, I had let my worries fester, take control, and dominate my life. Mental health problems had stunted my own growth, leaving me too scared to take on challenges. I quit things when they got hard. I turned down opportunities that would push me, or give me independence. I preferred being small. I was about to turn 30, and terrified I would use the breakup as an excuse to retreat, to be scared of life itself. I was not ready to run across a playing field. So I put on some old leggings and a T-shirt and walked to a dark alleyway 30 seconds from my flat. It fitted two important criteria: near enough to the safety of home, and quiet enough that nobody would laugh at me. I felt absurd and slightly ashamed – as if I was doing something perverse that shouldn’t be seen. I’m still giving it four stars though as it was very well written, with lots of interesting statistics on how running and exercise really does improve your well being and written in a humorous way to lighten the statistics and research load. If you suffer from anxiety and are looking for something in your day to day life that will help change your mindset, then I’d strongly recommend this book. In the years that followed, Bella’s anxiety escalated and she became bound by rituals; avoiding particular letters, numbers, colours and songs, and only travelling to self-designated ‘safe’ places. “There were loads of places I couldn’t go because I would panic on my own. You then become slightly agoraphobic – the world outside feels scary-unsafe,” she explains.

I had really weird dreams about the characters who I was trying to kill. I didn’t like any of the characters but I started feeling really guilty about killing them, which was quite a strange thing. I texted my mum one morning like, ‘I can’t kill the grandparents’ and she replied: ‘Just get them murdered’. She texted me every day asking if they were dead yet. So, yes I had weird dreams. I’m also now incredibly paranoid about anything that gets sent to my house because of one of the storylines. I’m absolutely petrified about where deliveries have come from, who sent it and what it is. So I’ve actually screwed myself with that because I never considered it before and now because of something I wrote myself, I’m terrified. Let's talk naming characters... Talking openly about mental health has really grown in the last decade. But I can clearly remember a frustrating period where depression was the only topic discussed. In the last few years anxiety has poked its anxious little head up and now there are many books about people’s experiences with anxiety, and it’s great to read similar experiences and coping mechanisms. Maybe I’ll write my own some day.

Publication Order of Non-Fiction Books

As a matter of fact, OCD begins with worrying thoughts. A mother that has OCD might unexpectedly reason, “What if I killed my daughter?” Now, though thoughts such as these are alarming, they are not abnormal. As a matter of fact, various studies reveal that every one of us experiences random negative feelings such as this occasionally. Five years since that first run, Bella is a confirmed runner for life. “I hope I’ll carry on running until my knees nally give out. Running is a life-long love for me now.” The big question is, who is this book for? I personally feel that if you're an anxious person (or suffer from any other mental health issues), then you'll find this insightful. It explains really well how that particular form of exercise can help you to detach from your problems (for a while); how it almost becomes a form of mindfulness and a welcome break from all the things that are dragging you down. Share how you’re feeling with friends and family, and seek professional advice. Visit your GP who may suggest medication and/or psychological therapies such as Cognitive Behavioural Therapy (CBT). Exercise, meditation and stepping away from social media can sometimes help reduce anxiety levels. But everyone is different. Anxiety is complex and affects people in different ways, so it’s important to get professional help.