If polyamory has entered its cultural adolescence, swinging is its elder cousin who has long outgrown the kids table at Thanksgiving. The swinger lifestyle is probably the most normalized form of non-monogamy with its own reality TV shows, all-inclusive resorts, and origin story lore that includes World War II Air Force pilots. And no, the upside-down pineapple thing was not a widespread supermarket swinger symbol, but, yes, at this point it’s become a cheeky, unofficial logo of the lifestyle. I think over the next three to five years, way more people are going to be doing it – it’s becoming more socially acceptable.’ Make yourself as sexy as can be," suggests Doc. Have well-lit photos. Use couple shots over group shots. Each picture should serve a purpose. Put the fish down. It’s not much different than any other online dating profile photo guide — except now it’s two of you. After a morning of topless photos on the beach, we invited a friend to our room for a threesome. She had suggestively asked to help celebrate my husband’s birthday, and he was more than happy to unwrap this gift. If you can’t handle seeing a dance floor make-out, you probably won’t be able to handle seeing their face full of someone else’s genitals.

When done properly, soft swinging can be a great way for couples to keep sex exciting and build intimacy and connection,’ explains Isabelle.Couple-swapping in the modern age involves the internet (sorry!). "We don’t recommend going out to a vanilla bar and trying to hook-up with people," says the other half of podcast Friends with a Twist, Madison. "It doesn’t usually work." Madison, 33, met her husband at a swinger house party surrounded by like-minded people, not at the local dive. It takes a lot of trust to successfully engage in consensual non-monogamy, which is a great skill to have in a relationship. You should take time to talk it through and process your thoughts and feelings around it,’ she says.

If you do end up going to bed together, make sure you’ve all discussed green and red lists. What do people definitely want to experience? What is off-limits for Carol? You’re now dealing with three or four (or more!) people’s preferences. There are many more opportunities for miscommunication. It can feel really awkward to be the person to bring it up, but if you keep an excited smile on your face while you do it, you come off as safe and responsible and fun. Remember: Discussing boundaries is just discussing how everyone can have a really hot time. That’s awesome! How to have sex with other people So, even if we end up having different partners in the future, it will never change the love we have for each other. Other problems can arise if boundaries are crossed, or partners fail to be honest about how they feel about soft swinging.’ Brenna also hates to see newbies come from a place of scarcity. "Couples with kids and a lot of obligations think they need to get all of the swinging done on this one night they had free that month." In reality, plenty of swingers only attend a couple of events per year. ‘Cum’ from a place of abundance and don’t stress if you ‘only’ play together in front of an eager audience. Enjoy each other. This is about inviting others into what you two share, not just getting some permissible stranger. Biphobia and transphobia in the lifestyle

Should we get into swinging?

It can feel daunting to go to a party where any type of sexual activity is encouraged. To ensure that you have a good time, below are three hot tip recommendations, straight from Venus Cuffs herself. Salted and sun-kissed, we returned to the cruise ship in time for erotic games by the pool for the chance to win teeny tiny LLV bikinis. Once he was inside the swinging subculture, Stern was surprised by what he found. He explains that he had preconceived notions of swingers that weren’t exactly flattering or, apparently, accurate. “The major stereotypes are that swingers are a subculture of overly libidinous miscreants that want to [have sex with] anything with a pulse,” he says. What he found, however, was that swingers are just regular men and women who may be a little more kinky than the average person, and often a lot more tolerant. “I’ve found swingers to be the most accepting and caring lot I’ve come to know in this life,” Stern says. “It’s probably because we’re all outside society’s norm, so we understand.” Opening up a relationship isn’t something couples should rush into without clear communication and fully understanding the expectations of both parties.